How to Watch the Royal Wedding (Includes Wedding Bingo)

I would say that Royal Weddings for this blog are the equivalent of the Super Bowl or the Olympics are to other blogs. But Royal Weddings are far more special and more rare, making them the eclipse or Haley’s comet of royal-inspired novelty blogs like my own. Lest you waste any opportunity to soak up any of the prettiness I have compiled my list of suggestions for how to properly take it all in with your own last-minute, seat of your pants, Royal Wedding Viewing party.

1.   Synchronize your watches! Here is the schedule for the wedding, so you can keep up even if you can’t get up at 6 a.m. when Catherine leaves her Rolls Royce.

2. Pretend the queen is coming.
Remember all those nice things you have that you never use? Get them out. Put a cloth on the coffee table, pour your orange juice into the crystal and eat your breakfast off your nicest plates and china. If you have a candleabra, I highly suggest using it. (Most situations in life in general can be improved by a candleabra).

3. Plan your menu.
Feel free to cheat and buy some scones at Starbucks tonight to have nearby. If you can, get some jam and double cream (or whipped cream if it’s all your grocer can muster.) If you choose to make a scone, here’s a great recipe. If you are really inspired and want to go all high tea on us, check out these easy recipes for party bites and tea sandwiches from Foodily. If you are waiting until the highlights are shown Friday evening, get to the grocer and buy them out of all frozen appetizers (mini quiches, pigs in blankets, arancini, tiny egg rolls), some bubbly and tell everyone you had it catered.

4. Cocktails!
I realize that 6 a.m. might be too early for some people to drink a cocktail. I realize that those people might not live in New York city where drinking at breakfast is perfectly acceptable if one calls it brunch and uses specialty mixers. Safe bets include Kir Royales or Bellinis (and it goes without saying that Bloody Marys are out of the question). Feel free to do your toast whenever you’d like, but here are some cocktails in case you need them.

5. Wear a hat. I cannot emphasize how important this is. British weddings involve copious hat wearing. Hat wearing at weddings is sole reason British people were able to build and then maintain an honest to goodness empire (for one, people in hats seem larger than life and tallness is essential in nation building. Also hats are often ridiculous so people don’t necessarily notice when they’ve been colonized because they’re so distracted confused). Even if you are matching it with your pajamas, find something to put on your head, even if you are threading a ribbon through a shoe box lid (which come to think of it, sounds sort of minimalist and awesome). If you have some tissue paper, you can make this hat.

6. Play Royal Wedding Bingo. I was going to make my own until I realized that it had likely been done and I was right. Print out your own copy here. 

6. Get your tweet and live chat on. I will try to be up tomorrow morning and Tweet while I should be studying furiously.  The brilliant and witty folks at New York Magazine will be liveblogging all day tomorrow. You don’t want to miss that. You can also join a livestream chatthrough iVillage with our version of royalty, Real Housewife Luann Jessups who is technically a Countess.

7. Repeat after me: But it’s their wedding!
People  planning weddings say this a lot and its the main reason that I can buy M&Ms with my face on them in a range of custom colors. “It’s their wedding” is the magic way to explain away anything so fun that it seems downright silly to other people. At some point, a loved one will ask you gently, “why are you doing this? We aren’t even British.” Just remember. It’s your day (and Cate and Will’s). And no one can tell you how you  celebrate it.

Will you watch the wedding? Tell me how you’re having fun with the monarchy’s big day.


4 thoughts on “How to Watch the Royal Wedding (Includes Wedding Bingo)

  1. Ladycathead says:

    Tomorrow I will probably be running around like mad making even more batches of last minute scones & waiting on a million people because I work in a tea house. Then I’m going home, opening up a big bottle of champagne, maybe two, and watching the recorded wedding. Probably falling asleep fifteen minutes into it but at least its recorded. @_@


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