Advice from the queen: Don’t be that guy

Most Sundays, the most revered queen of France stops whatever she is doing to answer your questions on love and life. To ask your own question, email at

My Queen, 

A friend of mine has some annoying habits. He belches loudly, wears wrinkled clothes and eats with his hands (spaghetti included). He’s up for

a promotion and I want to say something to him but don’t know if it’s my place. What do you recommend?




I feel for you. And realize any help I can give you might relieve your tableside problems as well. I sympathize. After all, who would someone want to pick for a position of responsibility? A dashing, tall drink of water? Or the sloppy fat man who shot pellets he rolled from the dirt on his own feet?

Pretty much a no-brainer, right? Nobody would choose foot-pellet guy. But in my day, no one had a choice. Louis Auguste  (my hubby) was their guy. And he was sweet, he was. But he continued to do stupid, stupid things. Like tickle his valet. And lift people in the air for no reason. Dearheart, He was that guy.

Add to all that an awkward doughiness and you have a bit of a disaster on your hands. Some even said he “looked like some peasant shambling along behind his plough; there was nothing proud or regal about him. His sword was a continual embarrassment to him and he never knew what to do with his hat.”

But Louis didn’t mind being the annoying guy. And he didn’t mind that it overshadowed his useful qualities like his fluency in English and competence in history and geography.

Shouldn’t a King know what to do with his hat? Wouldn’t it be reassuring for his people if he had some of that easy stuff down pat so he could master things like fiscal discipline and running the country?


Help your friend. Take him for a trial business lunch where you can help with his interview questions as well as his table manners. Have the right intentions and the results will usually fall in step.

What do you think? Did the queen get it right? What would you say? Tell her in the comments.


2 thoughts on “Advice from the queen: Don’t be that guy

  1. Rosemary says:

    Very astute answer. If your suggestion fails, I would consider dropping the dude.
    I simple cannot imagine sitting across someone with such bad table manners.


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